Who doesn’t want to be rich? In as much as riches solves some of human problems, don’t be surprised if you end up rich but unhappy.

These are personal experiences of millionaires who have made millions in the past and what they think about being rich. They first shared these on Quora.

One millionaire writes:

“I made $30M from my previous tech company.

For me,  the most surprising thing about being rich is that it’s an incredibly isolating experience.  What I mean by that is you can’t really complain about your problems except within your small circle of rich friends. Otherwise, you will sound like a douchebag.  Even if you do, non-rich people can’t really empathize with you.

There are a few problems associated with being rich such as general (lack of) motivation for work, family/friends asking for money, worry for how to motivate kids, spouse with different attitudes toward life after getting rich, potential spouse being a gold digger,  unexpected jealous reaction from friends/family, pressure to deal with more complex tax, estate planning and investment planning and etc.

The joy of “set for life” doesn’t seem to offset the anxiety from hoarding the huge sum of money. In addition, when you don’t work because you are rich but can’t hang out with your friends who have to work during the week, you feel like an outcast of society.

Overall, being rich is very isolating and that’s the most surprising thing I have experienced.”

A second millionaire wrote:

“I have almost four million dollars in the bank, made mostly on the side while working a tech job.  Not filthy rich but I have more in savings than anyone else I know in my peer group.  The first thoughts I have off the top of my head:

– Don’t tell anyone. At my last job over time, I foolishly somehow mentioned to my co-workers that I’ve accumulated quite a bit of cash trading and it changed the impression people had of me, and not for the better.  These are people that I had worked with for years and considered good friends.  Nobody ever asked for anything but there was an undertone of jealousy and little snarky comments sometimes when I absolutely never flaunted anything.  It never got better even though I never mentioned it again.  When I changed jobs to a new company, I vowed never to mention it anyone again under any circumstances.  Can’t advise this strongly enough. Don’t tell anyone. Friends, etc.  Tell your spouse it’s retirement savings, not mad money.

– Material things don’t do anything for you.  I know, it’s such a cliche, but take it from me, someone who thought I was different.  I bought amazing cars, had all kinds of cool toys, lived large for sure.  Nothing really lasted at the end of it all I later thought was that it was a lot of money I threw away on nothing.  Depreciating assets.  All it does is alienate you and the people you impress with that kind of spend isn’t really the kind of lasting people you want in your life..  Now I live a comfortable life consistent with my tech job income.

– While I might have a bunch in savings, I think real *wealth* is getting into a situation where you have passive income every month, meaning you do nothing and get a check cut to you every month.  If I don’t trade or don’t work my tech job, I won’t have any new income.  I think real wealth and security come from building up an empire (rental property, self-running business, etc) where you can have a check coming in, even not a huge one, that requires to do nothing.

– My stress level is low. My real job can blow up and I can coast as long as I need until I find my next gig.  Not that I ever want to do that but it’s nice knowing if you fall, you have a net.